Life is Like a Ping Pong Ball (cont'nd)
That's it for explanation. Time to enter (for scientific purposes of course). We go up Super Pussy's dark staircase. A stage is filled with mildly to solidly unattractive women who can't dance, sway to Pink Floyd. They seem bored. The club has about eight customers. One guy even brought a date. Instantaneously, a hostess swarms down on us like a fly on shit. "Two! Two! Do you want a table in back?"
The tables in back are filled with hookers. Danger! Danger!
"No, the bar is fine."
"What will you have to drink?"
Everything in strip clubs is extra. If you order from the hostess, it's three times the price. And sometimes they put "knock-out drops" in your drink so they can steal your wallet. Yikes! That's a lot of responsibility before one can view the classic "ping-pong ball" trick.
"We're fine. We don't need drinks!"
The hostess shoots lightening bolts of hate at us. The large manager comes over.
"What will you be drinking?"
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This is not a question. We order to two beers from the bartender. The bartender is like a 10-year old girl. I hope, at her age, she doesn't put knock-out drops in our drinks. In the spotlight, two slightly chubby naked women are pushing a car out on stage. This must be the "Lesbian Car Show" as listed on the menu. Sure enough, they perform a bored lesbian act on top of a car. Once finished, they push the car off stage again.
The next woman pulls a string of razorblades out of her cookie. She bows when the task is completed. People politely clap. Another woman appears, pulling an endless roll of streamers out from the unknown. She's followed by a woman doing the same with a long string of flowers. This is just plain odd. Not seductive. Just plain odd. I don't approve or condone of this behavior; I'm just saying its here and needs to be seen to be believed. It's my journalistic duty. Is this illegal in our country? Is it healthy!?
Suddenly, the nude stripper who did the razorblade stunt is standing next to me. Do I get charged if I talk to her? She starts playing with my hair as a woman onstage removes scarves from her privates. I'm momentarily scared of girls. Follow the words...
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